“I believe in you”


” I believe in you” seems a very simple statement but a very powerful one.  I was recently in an internal global hr workshop when some of my colleagues gave me this idea.  We were discussing of trust and then someone said that I should write on this subject – ” I believe in you”.  I was touched by the power of the statement and hence readily agreed to reflect on it and write about it.

Let us start to examine as to why this simple statement is so powerful ?  When was the first experience of this statement for most of us ?  I would first start with our family.  In most cases, our mothers more than our fathers would have expressed this to us as a kid in both verbal and non verbal behaviour.  Most mothers believe that their kids can do the impossible.  This belief in itself empowers the kid and creates a sense of self belief.  They encourage their kids not only to study but play every possible sport and also try their luck in co curricular activities.  Like in the photo above, a mother will always give a thumbs up to a child in all his actions and always believe he will succeed.  The eyes of the mother speak and encourages her child.

If we move to the school,  the best teachers repose their trust in their students and make them believe that they can excel in anything.  As a student I recall a very interesting incident in my childhood days.  I was interested in debating but had never done one.  One day my English teacher made me participate in a school debate and made me believe that I could do it.  I was very nervous since I had never debated before.  But the confidence of the teacher in me made me go ahead and not only participate but win a prize in the very first competition I participated.  The invisible pat of the teacher may motivate the student.

If we move to the workplace, many of us will recall that the best managers and leaders infuse confidence in us by their actions more than their words.  They are always willing to take the risk and allow us to experiment and fail.  They may or may not say to us that they believe in us always.  This encourages us to take the plunge in areas, which we never would have even dreamt of.  The words and actions of the manager should inspire the team member.

If we examine the behaviour of our mother, teacher or manager who believed in us, there are  some attributes common in all of them.  They give more than they take from others.  They are unconditional in praise and stingy in criticism.  They are always positive in their attitude and optimistic in their beliefs.  They encourage us to experiment and are willing to support us if we fail.  They will always come forward to take the blame on our behalf if something goes wrong.

If this is so simple, why do many of us fail to practise such a simple thing in life as parents, teachers, managers or leaders.  I believe the simple things in life are the most difficult to practise.  It is like telling the truth.  I am yet to meet anyone in life who does not want to be truthful all the time.  But most of us falter at some stage of life or their and learn from our mistakes.  Some times we may say it verbally but still it does not have any impact.  I believe this may be because there is no congruence between our words and our actions on the ground.  Our actions do not reflect our beliefs and hence our words do not mean anything to anybody.

I think  I learnt a simple lesson in life today.  I promise that I will infuse this spirit of ” I believe in you ” in myself as a leader from today and will always try to display it in my verbal and non verbal behaviour with my family, friends and colleagues.

It is indeed a good insight !.  What do you think ?

S Ramesh Shankar

Raising the bar

img_0866

I am always in awe of Sergey Bubka, the pole vaulter, who broke his own record at least seven times in his sporting career and has 35 world records to his credit. Many of us will tend to believe that if we have reached a peak in our career or vocation, we can relax and there is nothing more to aspire for.  But the people, who excel always think that there are no limits to excellence.  It is like this plane in the photo.  You do not know if it is landing or taking off.  You may reach your destination but the plane continues its journey.

Excellence is a journey and not a destination.  This is true in all aspects of life.  It does not matter what vocation or career or business we are in.  I recall my college days.  We used to have a bus conductor, who used to excel in his role.  He would sing songs, be courteous to passengers and crack jokes with everyone.  This made him a role model for all bus conductors to follow.  We see auto drivers, who are excellent.  They are courteous, provide newspapers and magazines, provide wifi and are always looking to improve their services to their customers.

In life, it does not matter what we are doing.  There is always scope for raising the bar.  As a sports person would say, it is up to us to define our goal.  There are no limitations in this world except our own mental limits.  We tend to be caught in our own circles and then blame the environment or other people when we cannot raise the bar.  The best in the world are always restless.  They try to seek the impossible and make it easily possible.

Many a time as ordinary mortals we fear the unknown.  We are afraid to take risks and tread a path of comfort.  We tend to believe that we are doing our best and nothing further can be accomplished.  Most of us stretch ourselves only when challenged.  Either a visionary manager or the competitive landscape around us challenges us.  Even then, we try to find an escape route.  We tend to find excuses for our own limitations.  We do not want to dwell in the world of the Unknown.

The greatest of women and men in the world have always done the impossible.  There are millions of examples in our lives, where people have excelled in unbelieable circumstances.  We recently saw the Winter Olympics and saw athletes from around the world, who excelled without any infrastructure or facilities to back their preparations.  They never complained but steadfastly pursued the goal to excel in whatever they do.

It is time to reflect.  What makes people excel ?  It is not the resources but the spirit within us.  Some times, the competitive environment may propel excellence but the power to compete with oneself time and again comes from within.  We should be hungry to beat ourselves in everything we do.  We should aim to be the best in the world always.  But being the best is never permanent.  The sooner we realize this, the better the chances for us to excel in this journey of excellence.

The best in the world compete with others and compete with themselves.  They always have the dream of bettering the best.

We can try.

S Ramesh Shankar

“I” versus  “U”

dsc04005

I have to take responsibility and give credit to U.  I have to lead by example and be a role model for U. I have always wondered where does I begin and U end.  In life, we tend to be centred around I and forget the U in most of our actions.  It is important to realize where to control the I and encourage the U and the We.

If we start in the family,  as parents, we tend to dominate our children.  The I in us dominates their life.  I tend to believe that I know what is good for my kids all the time.  It only changes when the kid turns an adolescent and then becomes a rebel.  The I in me gives way to the U.

At the work place, the scene is not much different.  As an individual, we work hard and excel and are a great team player.  But as we become a team leader, the I in us emerges and tries to dominate the U and We.  We forget how our leaders gave space and encouragement for us to excel.  This not only kills the enthuisiasm of our team members but also does not enable them to realize their full potential.

The social scenario is not very different.  Even as public figures emerge, they tend to be evolving as good leaders from the grass root level.  But the moment I starts dominating their ego, the U and We is subsumed.  This is the start of the downfall of the leader.

Thus, the earlier we realize the lessons of being humble and bury the I in our personality, the brighter are our chances of success.  This does not mean that I shirk my responsibilities in life by blaming U and we for all my failures.  As we learn in management, the responsibility has always to be with me but the credit is always to be given to the other person and the team.

It may be easier to write about than to practise.  It may be comfortable to advise others than to role model.  When your child is rebellious and you are told that you need to let go, it is not easy to digest that advise.  But as time passes and experience teaches you, one tends to realize and learn that I can be sacrificed for others.

May be it difficult to practise but worth a try.  What do you think ?

S Ramesh Shankar