Author: S Ramesh Shankar

Born in Trichy, Tamil Nadu, India, I have been brought up in different parts of India. Graduate in chemistry and post graduate in personnel management and industrial relations. Have been a HR practitioner for 38 years in the industry and have experience in working in steel , automobiles, FMCG and engineering industry. Was head of HR for Siemens in South Asia based out of Mumbai till March 2019. Currently founded hrishti - joy forever, a social enterprise to give back to society and work as Chief Joy Officer.

Treat everyone well..

Uncomfortable truth – “The way people treat you ,is a reflection of them. The way you tolerate it , is a reflection of you. “

I have spent my whole career in the field of Human Resources. Many employees have complained to me ,that they have not been treated well by their bosses, peers or even team members. I have always told them that we get ,what we give to others. It may be difficult to digest and also to practise. But, the reality is that, if we are able to get over this dilemma, then life is beautiful.

Let us focus on what is under our control and not on those things, which are not. We can treat people well without expecting anything in return. This may be difficult ,especially at a younger age. But, as we mature, if we are able to take this important step ,in building relationships, this may go a long way ,in our own lives at work and life, in general.

The question we have to ask ourselves is – “How do we treat everyone around us ?’ Many of us are kind and respectful to elders and seniors, at the workplace. Our behaviour dramatically changes with peers, subordinates and younger people ,around us. This dichotomy in behaviour is apparent and cannot be hidden ,for long.

We cannot have two personalities inbuilt in us. We need to learn to treat everyone around us well. It could be the house help at home, the security guard at work or the pantry staff. It does not matter. If we learn to treat everyone with respect and love, there is no reason ,they will not reciprocate the same.

There could be occasions, when someone in your family or friends circle or even at the workplace, may misbehave with you. As a youngster, our natural reaction is to hit back and behave, worser than them. However, as we grow in life and work, we may realise that our behaviour ,is a reflection of our personality and values. The behaviour of others is a reflection of them. The way we tolerate them ,is a true reflection of our nature.

One may argue that how do we react to someone ,who is misbehaving with you ? Yes, it may not be easy, especially at a young age or at the beginning of your career. However, the day we realise that our behaviour is under our control and the other person’s behaviour is beyond our control, we may be able to practise , this basic tenet for good relationships.

We need to mature to realise, that if we lose our temper or throw tantrums, it is a reflection of our own self and our control over our mind. On the other hand, a person who does not react negatively, to someone throwing tantrums or being impatient, is respected more, by others in the group.

The reality of life is that ,others treat us ,the way we treat them. If we respect others and treat them with love, we are likely to be respected and treated with love. On the contrary, errant behaviour may result in worser reactions and may get beyond our control.

Let us treat everyone well from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

8th June 2025

Everything is temporary in life

Same tree, different season. Remember, everything is temporary.

I love this picture. It made me realise that nothing is permanent in life. We are enthralled with some good happenings in life and we think that life is going to be happy forever. This may not happen. On the other hand, when we are confronted with some tragedies in life , we are heart broken and lose our self belief. It may shatter us and we may think that life is coming to a grinding halt.

The truth is that nothing is permanent in life. Everything is temporary and has an expiry date. It is almost like every product which we buy has an expiry date and cannot be used ,after that date. Similarly, joy or sorrow, is ephemeral. Nothing lasts forever.

I can narrate a lot of incidents and share how it impacted me. I almost believed that Life has come to a dead end. I lost belief in God and in myself. But then ,over time, I realised that everything is temporary in life.

Just as the leaves are shredded by the tree during autumn and they get them back during spring, so is joy and sorrow. They possibly alternate in our lives to keep us grounded ,always. We may fly in the sky with some happy news and drown in the oceans ,when we are burdened by tragedies. But, life teaches us that all these are cyclic and do not last forever.

Let me illustrate this with a few real life experiences – both in my personal life and work. Let me start with my life. I lost both my parents at an early age. Lost my mother at 23 and father at 25. I had just started my career and felt as if I was pushed below the lowest bed of the Indian Ocean. However, after a few years, life experiences made me stronger, more self dependant and grateful to my parents, for whatever they did, to make me what I am today.

Similarly, at the workplace, I lost a promotion at an early stage in my career. I thought I was doing well at work and was recognised regularly for my contributions. But, when I was superseded in by a junior, I felt humiliated and felt as if it was the end of my career. However, the reality is that ,this propelled me to take up challenging career moves and thus made me realise my career dreams successfully.

I have also met many people in my life, who have gained and lost in many ways. When you gain something, you tend to feel elated and when you lose, you are down under. However, if and when, you realise that nothing is going to last forever, it gives you the resilience, to get over both, with ease.

It may be easier to write about it ,rather than experience in real life. However, having experienced it in many ways in my life, I can confidently state ,that it is the truth of life. The sooner we realise this, the better it is, for our well being. Nothing will last forever. No storm or earthquake lasts forever. They come and go. Life is no different.

Let us learn to accept ,that everything is temporary in life ,from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

8th June 2025

Expect nothing in life…

“Expect nothing and everything becomes a gift. Disappointment is the tax on unrealistic hopes.” – Vintage prudence.

I saw this quote accidentally and it taught me ,a great life lesson. Another beautiful quote, which has always inspired me is “Frustration is the gap between achievement and hope”.

If we are able to live life without expecting anything, we may be happy, with whatever we get in life. In my life book, life is all about contentment and gratitude. We need to be content with whatever we have and we need to be ever grateful to the people in our lives, who have made it possible, for us.

We tend to expect a lot of things in life ,even before we set our foot forward. So, when we do not realise most of them, we are disappointed. Is it realistic to expect nothing in life ? May not be. But, to expect things realistically, it may be possible.

We give our exams in school and college and we know realistically ,how we have fared. So, we may not get disappointed with results if we get what we expect, whenever they are announced. But if we are sure, we have not done well and still expect to top the class, we are thoroughly disappointed.

Life is no different. Our expectations have to be grounded in reality. Our realistic goals embeded with our hard work and focussed efforts, will lead us to ,what we want to achieve. However, in reality, our dreams are generally ambitious. Our efforts are mediocre and hence when we do not achieve our set goals, we get frustrated.

A sportsperson preparing for the olympics ,works for years, to achieve her goal. She works ,day in and night out ,to represent her country and stand on the podium with a medal. Her efforts will determine the colour of her medal. She does her best and if she wins , she is happy but if she loses, she is aware that she could not match ,the best in the world.

We need to live life ,that way. The less we expect, the lesser will be our disappointment. The recent pandemic of Covid across the world , taught us great life lessons. We realised how privileged we are. We could survive months ,without going to the workplace. Many of us did not lose our jobs. We could eat and live healthily and our family and friends supported us.

On the other hand, many daily wage earners lost their job and their livelihoods. Many lost their lives ,as they could not sustain ,on the onslaught of the virus. We need to realise that gratitude is critical for happiness in life. We have to be grateful for what we have ,rather than worry about what we do not.

Life is a zero sum game. We get what we deserve. We get what we work for. Nothing appears from thin air. We need to struggle today ,for a better tomorrow. No sportsperson wins a championship by luck. He has to work hard, day and night and with sweat and blood ,to be the best in their sport and win a championship.

Let us learn to expect nothing in life and we may rejoice everything we get. This does not mean ,we do not strive and give our best ,to achieve our goals. This only means ,that effort is in our hands and not the results.

Let us focus on our efforts from today ,without worrying about the results.

S Ramesh Shankar

8th June 2025