What wrong did I do ?

All of us face ups and downs in our everyday life. However, when we have not done anything wrong from our side and something unfortunate happens, you wonder -“What wrong did I do ?

It could be ,that you had a great run all through the year and you were expecting a promotion and a leadership role ,but at the end of the year, you are denied the same. You wonder – What wrong did I do ?

I surpassed all my targets, I got positive feedback from my manager and he has assured me that I was grooming well, for the next level role. But, when promotions were announced, my name was missing.

You keep wondering and questioning, your own work. However, the reality is that, you have not got recognised or promoted. You may sometimes wonder ,if it is worth working so hard and exceeding all your targets and displaying your true potential.

The truth is that you feel very hurt. It may take a few weeks or even months to recover from this shock. I have experienced this in my career and hence I understand the impact it has ,on the individual.

However, when you recover and sit back and reflect, you realise that you did your best and deserved the promotion. However, if the leadership team including your manager ,did not see that in the same light – it could mean two things. Either, there was not an appropriate opportunity to accommodate you or you did not project yourself enough to be recognised or somebody more deserving than you may have been promoted.

Again, it becomes challenging ,to accept this reality. But, if you are able to get over this initial disappointment, you realise that it is your duty to do your best and present yourself ,to the best of your ability ,to your seniors. If you do not get recognised, it is more their failure , than yours.

It is like ,a cricketer has the highest average amongst all batters in a team ,but she is not selected in the playing level, for the next match. This cricketer will feel highly disappointed ,for not being selected. But, she has to realise ,that her statistics speak ,for her performance. It is more the failure of the selectors ,than the skills of the cricketer.

Life is no different. We may feel disappointed when we put in hard work and do not get the recognition we deserve. But, we need to realise that ,efforts is always in our hand ,but recognition is beyond our control. The best will never rest. They continue to excel and I can assure you ,that they can never be ignored for long.

We need to work hard and put our best foot forward ,in life or work, and leave the rest ,to the people responsible to recognise us. We know for ourselves ,that we have done our best. Let us leave the rest, to the judges of our destiny. Yes, sometimes, they may err in judgement. But, they are also human and so are we. We could feel bad and they may also realise their mistakes ,before it is too late.

Let us continue to strive for the best, without worrying – “What wrong did I do in life ?

S Ramesh Shankar

2nd Jan 2025

Luxury versus Simplicity

“Luxury is artificial poverty, simplicity is natural wealth”

The simplest things in life are possibly the most difficult to achieve. I was recently watching a TV show, where someone shared this quote. I found it interesting. Let me illustrate this ,with a simple example.

Many of us resolve in the new year, to go for a walk every day ,to maintain good health. It is so simple ,since you do not need any equipment ,nor anyone’s help to do this. But, most of us fail within the month of January itself.

A daily walk is simple and natural way to maintain our health. On the other hand, if we do not do any exercise every day and end up being over weight, we may be advised to go for a bariatric surgery to reduce unnecessary body weight, which is artificial and against nature and we may call it artificial poverty to reduce our weight.

Life is not very different. If we look back at our forefathers, they lived a simple life and were healthy, wealthy and wise. Today, we have all the technology in the world . In India, the middle class is prospering and have all the comforts of life. But our children are becoming obese and people in their forties ,are getting heart related diseases.

I am a great fan of technology and how it can make life more comfortable, for mankind. Even the latest fad of Artificial Intelligence (AI) can definitely make our lives more comfortable and predictable. But when we tend to make technology as the end in itself, rather than the means to an end, we end up struggling in life.

We need to continually invent new technologies and be in control of the outcomes ,for the welfare of mankind. However, if we allow technology to dictate our lives and become a victim of the same, then we may have to face the ill consequences of it.

Let me illustrate this with another simple example. The mobile phone is ubiquitous today. Most of us will find it difficult to survive without it . It enables us to remain connected with family and friends. It works like a watch/clock, calculator, GPS, bank and even as AI assistant, for all our questions in life.

However, if we stop having good conversations with our family members/friends and restrict communication to whatsapp or social media exchanges, it could lead to broken families and friendships.

Emails, whatsapp and social media do not have emotions, but people do. So, when we exchange messages through these media, many a time,we may hurt feelings of others or get hurt by others ,without any intent to do so. When two human beings interact face to face, such misunderstandings are minimised ,since you are able to clarify to each other ,based on the reaction of the other person.

We do not visit family or friends ,when they are in distress. We are happy to send them bouquets and smiley through social media. A person in distress ,may need a hug or someone to talk to. But, we do not realise the same, unless we ourselves are personally in distress.

Let us learn to simplify our lives and go back to basics.

S Ramesh Shankar

5th July 2025

Respect, Honesty, Trust & Loyalty

“Respect is earned. Honesty is appreciated. Trust is gained and Loyalty is returned.”

We do get a lot of whatsapp messages every day wishing us good morning and also sharing with us some interesting quotes or videos. Many of the these quotes give me ideas to write blogs. Someone asked me as to how I get ideas every week. Apart from my own reflection and insights, I get a lot of ideas from such sources and also from my interactions with people at all levels.

As a HR professional for life, I have had the privilege of interacting and learning from all levels of employees. These interactions were also a great source of ideas. The above quote on respect, honesty, trust and loyalty helped me to distinguish the four concepts.

Let us first understand “Respect”. In the early stage of our lives, we may respect our parents, elders and teachers out of fear or due to consequences associated with non adherence. But, as we grow up in life, we respect people, who earn their respect.

We may not necessarily respect a senior at work. A senior colleague earns respects through his actions and not his words. When leaders walk their talk, they earn respect. When there is no gap between what they say and what they do, they earn respect. We may wish a senior colleague in a formal way ,but that may not necessarily mean, we respect them.

As kids, we are taught in school and college to be honest in all dealings. Our parents and teachers almost spend their lifetime, trying to inculcate this value of honesty in us. We do appreciate the value of honesty but sometimes, when we see successful people around us, who are dishonest, we start questioning if this value of honesty is worth living.

After we go through the ups and downs in life and if we have pursued a path of honesty ,we realise that we are always appreciated for our honesty. I have never missed a good sleep at night ,since I have been honest in my profession ,right through my life. Further, union leaders always appreciated honest officers and I experienced this right from the beginning of my career. when, even senior corrupt officers were being gheraoed on an issue, the union leaders always appreciated us for our honesty and hence always kept us away from gheraos and other forms of coercive protests.

The most expensive thing in the world is Trust. It can take years to earn and a matter of seconds to lose it. Trust is gained through our, day to day actions. Parents, teachers or elders gain trust of the youngsters, when they see them practising ,before they preach. Trust is never gained through words or speeches. It is always gained through our explicit actions. It takes years to earn trust ,but may be seconds to lose it. A politician may have earned the trust of his voters and won multiple elections but when he is convicted in a corruption scandal, the years of trust is lost in minutes.

Lastly, loyalty is always returned. An employee, who is well taken care by any organisation, never wants to leave because of loyalty and wants to return the good will, through her service to the organisation. A player never leaves a team, if taken care of , during good and bad times and continues to be loyal to the team.

Let us learn to distinguish respect, honesty, trust and loyalty from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

1st July 2025