All the liquor shops were closed across the country during the lockdown and the lovers of the spirit had a difficult time.  They had stocked enough but it was not good enough as they could not anticipate the two extensions.  This may be equally true for the smokers.  While I am told that both alcohol and cigarettes were available in the black market but it was almost unaffordable for the common man.

The question I ask myself as to why people get addicted to alcohol or cigarettes ?  Being a teetotaller and a non smoker, some may wonder whether I am competent to write on this subject. Luckily for me there are many in my family and friends’ circles who swear by alcohol and the cigarette.  My wife has been a counsellor in a de-addiction centre at the beginning of her career.

I would like to reflect on why people get addicted to alcohol, cigarettes or drugs ?  It is not that people who are born in families addicted to any of these only fall victims to this addiction.  It is common people coming from all walks of life who fall prey to this disease called addiction.

We all go through crests and troughs in life.  Some of us are able to cope with it while others get stressed out.  It may be for reasons beyond their control or their ability to bear the stress.  It is not easy to deal with stresses of life at different stages.  As an adolescent, one tends to be rebellious and wants to prove to the world how one is different and can stand out in society.

As we grow up as adults, we are ashamed to share our stress with anyone and thus find it difficult to cope with it.  In today’s world, where joint families have paved their way to nuclear families and neighbourhoods are no longer a wall of social support, it the the individual alienation in society which is the root cause of the problem.  While we have become comfortable to go to a doctor to discuss all our medical issues, it is still a stigma to go to a psychiatrist or a counsellor to discuss about our stresses and strains in life.

In today’s digital world, human connections are diminishing.  We do not even know our neighbours leave alone distant friends or relatives.  We do not live in joint families and hence do not have parents, elders, uncles or aunts to share our agonies.  The virtual world is a make believe world and we do not realise it unless reality strikes us hard.  We are proud to think that we have hundreds of friends on social media but realise that there is nobody around us when we get admitted to a hospital to attend to us.

It is in this state of mind, we believe that alcohol, cigarettes or drugs can cure us of depression.  We imagine that a drink in the weekend or a smoke at the end of a stressful day will relive us of all pains in life.  This may be psychologically true for the individual concerned but the reality is different.  The best of alcohol or cigarettes or drugs do not have any magic properties to help us get over our miseries in life.  We take time to realise that we are the creators of own miseries in life.

It is our attitude to life and living, which can make a difference.  The day we realise that we do not need spirits to lift us up in life, we can bring a change.  All of us go through similar trials and tribulations in life.  While some of us are able to cope with it, others succumb to the addiction of these artificial support systems.  The spirit, cigarette or drug is like a ventilator to a patient in distress.  The day the patient realises that their life is over the day the ventilator plug is pulled out is the day, they are willing to fight back in lie.

The day we are willing to give up any form of addiction in life is the day we realise that we are the makers of own destiny.  No force on earth can make us happy or sad in any situation.  No stress in life can make us crumble like ashes.  It is our attitude to life, which makes all the difference.  The day anyone realises the harmful effects of any addiction is the beginning of their journey to freedom from addiciton.

I am not trying to be a moralist here.  I have nothing against people drinking or smoking.  What I am against is the belief that drinking or smoking can cure us of all our stresses in life.  It never can.  It is our ability to face a crisis head on and deal with it, which will make all the difference to our lives.  It is like a smoker can give up smoking one day in a fraction of a second when they decide they want. to.  On the other hand, a smoker who pledges to give up slowly and gradually ends up smoking all his life.

It can be addiction to coffee or tea as in the photo above and not necessarily cigarettes or alcohol.

So, it is upto us to decide what we want to be.  Every human being is capable of dealing with their own stresses and strains in life.  It is upto us to wake up one morning and say that ” I am in control of myself and I can lead a life of my own”.  It is then addiction can transform into de-addiction.

The day to start is today and the time is now.

Why delay ?

S Ramesh Shankar

6th May 2020

 

 

 

 

 

 

Every crisis is an opportunity. That is the way to look at life. If we can find ways and means to convert every crisis or challenge in our lives into an opportunity, we will be better of. It is better to look at life as a chain of possibilities rather than a string of problems.

The lockout in India and many countries around the world is a necessary condition for us to fight a virus, which we do not know much about. While many of us are cursing the government and everyone around us for the situation, some of us are converting this crisis into an opportunity.

Some may ask how do we convert every crisis into an opportunity ? Let me illustrate my point with a few examples – both from my personal life and work life so that we look at possibilities rather than challenges. Let me start with the personal life first.

While we have all the time in the world, some of us are getting bored with it. Some others are wondering what to do. I decided that I will use this time to do housekeeping in our entire house. Every nook and corner of the house got cleaned. All our documents were put in place and arranged systematically. Our clothes were sorted, junk identified and disposed and surplus things segregated to be donated to people who need them more than us.

Similarly at the workplace, we have an opportunity to look at how do we reduce the cost of our operations. We can form teams to innovate and give ideas to cut process delays, make improvements in the way we have been doing things. We can challenge existing systems and processes and get rid of all waste in the system.

In most organisations, material cost accounts to 70% of total cost. How do we reduce this cost ? Even in labour cost, we can think innovative and reduce the same by trimming salaries rather than manpower. For eg. we can reduce senior management salaries by 20%, middle management by 10% and even workmen by 5% in consultation with the unions. This may reduce our overall cost by 10% without having to make people lose jobs. This requires proactive discussions with the unions and preparing employees to face the challenge together. The CEO and senior management could lead this effort by voluntarily taking a 20% cut so that they lead by example.

I am willing to volunteer to partner with any organisation to share ideas and see through till implementation for optimising their costs, especially employee costs without manpower reduction. My services will be honorary and if you achieve your goals, you can contribute to my cause of “preventing blindness amongst children by donating directly to my partner organisation.”

We are in a war like situation in India and most of the countries of the world. We in India are lucky that we are a democratic state. We have an elected government at the centre and in the states. We need to trust our leaders and believe they have more information and wisdom than we have in dealing with this crisis. In a war, we need to trust our leader and follow her or him like a true follower. Followership is more important than leadership in any crisis situation. Many of us are using social media to spread rumours and negativity. This will not help us in any way. Let us spread positivity and salute the front line warriors who are sacrificing their lives to save us.

Each of us can contribute in our little ways by staying at home and be self disciplined. We can support the poor daily wagers by helping them with food, shelter or any other means. Even if each of us take care of the servants who work with us and other low paid employees in our community or workplace, we would be doing our bit to get over this crisis.

As in the photo above, our security guards are supporting us in distributing newspapers, watering the garden, collecting wet waste, housekeeping and many other errands, which is much beyond their job descriptions. This will make them multi-skilled, which will help them in their career too and earn more than they otherwise would.

Let us be happy and proud that India is much better off than most nations in the world. The good news is that the governments at the centre and the states are working together to fight this crisis. We as individuals and communities need to support the government in fighting this war against the virus together.

Let us contribute our little bit every day.

S Ramesh Shankar

14th April 2020

Every one of us has the freedom to choose our religion in a democratic state. We may be Hindus, Christians, Sikhs, Muslims or Buddhists. In my view, all religions lead us to the same destination. The routes could be different but the goal post is the same. Each religion teaches you multiple ways of attaining your goal. At every stage of life, you realise that you have to improve a lot to reach your ultimate station in life.

Am I religious ? I am not sure. My definitions of religion is ” To be a better human being, every day I live, enjoying myself and making life enjoyable for everyone around me in whatever ways I can.” I am a Hindu and proud to be so. Hinduism is one of the most liberal religions in the world. It gives you alternative paths and allows you to choose what best suits you. It neither imposes any rituals on you nor directs your behaviour or actions. The same may be true for most modern religions of the world.

However, I do believe that “Religion” has become a business in the world today. The causes for this belief could be life style and stress of people today. We are constantly competing in the world and want the best of everything around us with minimum of efforts. We are in a rat race and never satisfied with what we have. Our greed invariably exceeds our need. This leads to unavoidable stress and then we fall prey to religious leaders who exploit this emotional vacuum in us.

We tread on a dangerous path out of our own choice. We want to conquer the world before anyone else. We are willing to sacrifice our health and life to achieve our goals. Sometimes, we may be willing to compromise on our values to realise our dreams. This leads to degeneration of life and also may impact our health. It not only makes us physically vulnerable but emotionally too.

While technology today could help us detect and cure physical illness, it may not be able to cure our emotional strain. We then turn to our family and friends for emotional support. When friends and family do not have the time or patience , we go to the religious gurus. They could be from any religion you follow. All religious gurus tend to exploit the situation we are in and make this their business.

We are willing to spend a lot of money to get rid of this emotional trauma. We do not realise that we are responsible for putting ourselves in this situation. We cannot blame the world or our family, friends or colleagues for putting ourselves in this quandary. Then we approach a religious guru. Most religious leaders today are running religion like a business. They look at how to exploit your weakness into monetary gain for themselves.

These are the actions, which makes me lose respect for the religious leaders. I sometimes feel bad even visiting temples or other religious places because the leaders create an atmosphere of greed in these spiritual places. Anything and everything can be monetised. You can have a darshan of God faster by paying more money. We forget that all humans are equal in front of God. We are happy to flaunt our money to get closer access to God or their forms.

If I reflect, I would like to blame myself for this state of affairs. We, as individuals have through our actions made religion a business. Our greed is exceeding our need and thus leading to religious exploitation. We start believing that we can busy anything and everything in life through money. The day we realise that money cannot buy everything in life and least so happiness, we may be better off.

As in the photo above, we have to restore the sanctity of religion by our own actions in every day life.

It is time to reflect ? What do you think ?

S Ramesh Shankar