Author: S Ramesh Shankar

Born in Trichy, Tamil Nadu, India, I have been brought up in different parts of India. Graduate in chemistry and post graduate in personnel management and industrial relations. Have been a HR practitioner for 38 years in the industry and have experience in working in steel , automobiles, FMCG and engineering industry. Was head of HR for Siemens in South Asia based out of Mumbai till March 2019. Currently founded hrishti - joy forever, a social enterprise to give back to society and work as Chief Joy Officer.

Double Standards…

I find it amusing when people have different yardsticks for themselves vis a vis others. This phenomenon is seen in families, organisations and society at large. As a parent, I can go anywhere without informing my spouse or other family members but nobody in the family dare do it.

In organisations, we commonly see bosses demanding punctuality, timely submission of reports and so on but feel offended if reminded of not doing the appraisals of their team members on time.

Life appears to be of double standards most of the time. One standard for me and one for others. I may get away with double standards at home as long as I am the oldest and respected but the day my kids turn adolescent they will see through me and I will lose all respect.

Even in the organisation, I may survive till I am able to wield power and authority. The day I get a boss who leads by example and demands the same from others, I am doomed. I wonder how managers and leaders imagine that they can live with double standards for long.

In my book on leadership, we can never have double standards and be inspirational. Whether it is family, organisation or society at large, the concept of double standards is never sustainable. One can fool oneself for sometime and think we can be that way but time will catch up and we will be caught unawares on this front.

Lets examine it in the family space. As a father and being the oldest in the family, I may escape till my spouse rebels some day or my children do. It could also be that my siblings or neighbours, who teach me a lesson and then I change.

In the organisation, people think they can slip through if they hold senior leadership roles. Yes, they survive till the day they get dis-respected or hurt by a feedback from a colleague, customer or supplier. That day will make them change and change for the better. If they dont change, they may lose their leadership position sooner than later.

It is important to realise that leaders are respected not only for results but their behaviour as well. In my book, behaviour is as important as results, if not more. Both in life and career, behaviour will be the ultimate differentiator between good and great people.

Many people go scot free in the short term with double standards. This makes others believe that it is ok to have them. However, it is important to realise that it will never work in the long term. The sooner we realise it, the better it is for us and others around us.

We can never have two standards for anything. All standards for life are absolute and it is the same for everyone irrespective of social level, position, race, colour or nationality. The day we realise this basic tenet of life, we may realise our full potential.

As in the photo above, it is like my advising others to take a metro to reduce carbon footprint but I drive my own car every day of my life.

We need to remember there can never be double standards for anything in life.

S Ramesh Shankar

22nd February 2021

Silent Contributors

I was watching a video explaining the value of gratitude in life. I realised that many of us are not grateful to the people around us amongst family, friends and colleagues, who have transformed our lives from childhood. But apart from the visible people around us, there are so many silent contributors, who impact our lives every day.

Today I thought let me recall the “Unsung heroines and heroes in our lives.” If I start my day with a morning coffee, I need to be grateful to the milkman and the newspaper vendor, who quietly delivers my needs every day without fail. Whether a pandemic or not, the milkman or newspaper boy has never taken leave.

Then if I am taking a cab or auto or bus to my workplace, these drivers have faced the wrath of the weather or the pandemic and still are there for us to take a comfortable ride to work or any place of our choice.

The vegetable vendor, the e commerce delivery girls and boys have served us without expecting anything in return. Have we ever thought about being grateful to them in our lives. We almost take them for granted.

The Presswala, who irons my clothes, the Gardner, the house helpers, car cleaners, the security guards in my premises and the maintenance staff in my community and at my workplace have never taken a break so that we are always comfortable.

If any of my appliances at home break down I am eagerly waiting for the service technician whether it is a weekday or the weekend. The entire service community serves us day in and night out and we never bother to acknowledge their efforts.

Let us think of the government servants. The public health staff, the doctors, health workers, nurses, policemen and women are working for us 24 x 7. We almost take it for granted as if they are paid to work for us. Have we ever bothered to bow in gratitude to them.

Another important segment is the people who support us and enable us to succeed behind our back. They could be our teachers, who sacrifice their lives to ensure the success of their students. Many a time, the people who contribute a lot to our success never take credit for the same. I salute the faceless people, whom we may never come to know as to how much they made a difference to our lives.

Many of us tend to forget the people who have made us who we are today. It may be a good idea to visit our school teacher or an old neighbour or an aging aunt who helped us during our childhood. Expression of gratitude makes you feel humble and grounded. I recently visited a few friends and relatives and thanked them and they felt very nice about it.

Last but not the least, let us remember the soldiers on the borders from our armed forces who relentlessly sacrifice their comforts for our safety. They are there round the year and even sacrifice their lives so that we are safe as an individual and as a nation.

As in the photo above, the security guards in our community served us 24×7 always with a smile.

The list is endless. We need to be grateful to the family, friends and colleagues who are around us and visible to us every day. We also need to salute the silent contributors to our lives every day. It is important to remember that they serve us without expecting anything in return.

Is it time to bow in gratitude ?

S Ramesh Shankar

19th Feb 2021

Sparks of brilliance…

All of us have genes of brilliance ingrained in us. It is like the diamond hidden in the carbon below the earth. We need to keep looking within and one day we may find to our surprise what we are brilliant at.

It is generally our parents or teachers who find the gems in us. They look at every child as a potential and look for what we are good at. As we grow up, they make us realise our potential. However, as we become adults and work in organisations or even on our own, we either tend to forget our potential or do not find a mentor who can see that in us.

I realise that everyone of us has sparks of brilliance and it is upto someone to help us discover it. So, all of us as parents, teachers, friends, colleagues, bosses or even neighbours have a responsibility to help individuals discover their full potential.

Every child is born with innate talent. If someone in their life is able to help the child realise that capability through careful mentoring and support, then they become gems in life. Otherwise, that potential goes waste and neither we nor others benefit from it.

It is like any team game. In football, cricket or hockey, it is the coach, who helps every player reach their full potential. If the coach is not a great motivator, a true friend, a wonderful teacher or a mentor who never gives up, the best of every player is never seen. On the other hand, ordinary teams show sparks of brilliance when they have a great coach.

I have seen repeatedly in life that great parents or teachers transform the lives of children and bring out the best in them. Similarly great coaches make ordinary teams look extra ordinary. Similarly great bosses, make ordinary employees perform superbly.

On the other hand, a negligent teacher, an impatient parent or poor boss can make individuals less confident of themselves and we may never be able to discover our true worth.

As an employee throughout my life, I have learnt that the best in me came out when I was given the freedom to experiment, the luxury to fail and the time to discover myself. Every manager has a role to play to treat every individual in their team as an unique potential talent.

Every one of us has something within us. We need the right environment to flourish and encouragement to fail and learn. The recognition that we are capable of much more than we have done so far will be of immense help.

Every word of encouragement motivates us. Every act of support enables us to try our best. Every recognition of minor accomplishments makes us excel in whatever we do. It is people around us who make us what we truly are. Of course, we need to put our best foot forward.

As in the photo above, every mother discovers the brilliance in her child.

The light within us is always burning. We just need to ignite the spark and then we realise that the flame can be brighter than we thought and makes us realise our best.

Let us discover the best in us today.

S Ramesh Shankar

21st February 2021