Category: Life & Living

Back to school

The other day I was returning from the market and I was pleasantly surprised to see groups of kids returning from school. There was a spark in their eyes and they were playing around and fooling with each other.

The pandemic paralysed life in different ways. One of the worst affected were the kids in school and college. They lost two years of real life learning in their lives. No class can teach you what life can teach you when you interact with others. The best lessons I have learnt in life is the interaction I have had with other students and teachers in my school and college life.

It could be attending a class and learning from one another by asking questions or answering them. It could be doing a project together. It could be just playing on field and fighting with each other but at the end , learning lessons on conflict resolution.

While I am a great believer in technology and use it to the hilt both in my personal and professional life, I do believe that there can be no better way to learn than experiencing life lessons every day in the real world.

The fate of employees in organisations is no different. The virtual office, video meetings and all that ensured that , life goes on and we earn our wages and serve our customers to the best of our ability. But real lessons at work are learnt when you meet one another, work along side in a project and celebrate deadlines together.

We may have attended multiple programs on conflict resolution and team work over the last two years and even got certified. However, we may find it difficult to resolve a real conflict on the shop floor ,when a section of the union , strikes work.

It is like all of us would have attended live fire fighting sessions but find it difficult to put on a fire extinguisher when a real fire hits us. Imagine the fate of the employees who have attended fire fighting course online and have never seen a fire extinguisher in real and do not even know where they are placed.

Hence, I was pleasantly surprised when I saw children returning from school after attending physical classes the other day. I hope employees are also able to get back to work and interact with one another and learn from real life experiences every day.

It is time to realise that the virtual world is not necessarily replicated in the real world. It is like the postings on social media which may not reflect the true feelings or actions of a person. It is what we see in real, which is real, the rest is illusory.

The pandemic has made life difficult for all of us. But it has also enabled us to adapt and learn. A good example is that of digital payments. We see the road side vendors, the small grocery stores or even the milkman or maids being comfortable to deal with digital payments. We possibly are the country with highest digital payment density in the world.

We need to find the gap between the virtual and the real world and learn from real life experiences every day.

Lets make life real every day

S Ramesh Shankar

8th March 2022

More than fortunate

Many of us crib day in and night out for something or the other. We crib about not having a car or being unhappy with our career or not being able to go on a holiday abroad due to the pandemic.

This cribbing nature starts from our childhood. and continues through our adolescence and even as adults. We die by comparisons in everything from food, material things, vacations and life in general.

The only catch is that we tend to compare with people who are better off than us and not the people who are not as well placed as we are. When someone points out that we need to compare with the less privileged, we shrug it off stating that it is their destiny, what can we do about it. But the same is not our destiny when we compare and feel jealous than the better off than us.

I want to share two real life stories, which can help us reflect on what life has given us and why we need to be grateful for all that we have and not crib about all that we don’t. Both these stories are real and I have personally known them. I am changing the name of the person and place for anonymity and to respect their privacy.

The first story is that of Padma who was a house help in my house in Mumbai. She is married to a carpenter and has two lovely kids. Her husband works in a garment factory. She has admitted both her children in an english medium school since she wants them to do well in their lives.

Padma’s husband is an alcoholic and comes home drunk every day and ill treats his wife and even his kids. Apart from not contributing to the family’s finances, he ends up spending all his money on his drinking habit. He further ends up with huge debts due to this habit. His wife works in 4 houses from morning 830 am to evening 630 pm every day, six days a week and manages all the finances of the house and takes care of her young aspiring children , playing the role of mother and father to the kids.

The second story is that of Radha. Radha lives in a small town of Jabalpur. Her husband was pulling carts and now runs a small petty shop. She goes around as a beautician and earns by giving home service to women who need her services. She had two sons. The younger of the two , died ten years back committing suicide because of the poor condition of the family. Radha along with her husband with their meagre income educated her elder son. He got his MBA and today works in a bank. However, at the age of 25, instead of being grateful and indebted to his hard working parents, has become an alcoholic and misbehaves with his parents, who have made him successful in life.

I had tears in my eyes when I heard both these stories. I have personally interacted with both these women and tried to counsel them in my own way.

It is time to look at our own lives with these lenses of Radha and Padma. If we do not feel most fortunate , then there is something wrong in us. We need to look at the mirror again and again till tears dry up in our eyes.

It is time to reflect and be grateful always.

S Ramesh Shankar

25th March 2022

The autumn of our life

Autumn is the season between summer and winter. It is the time when the trees shed their leaves and the furred animals grow thicker fur to face the harsh winter ahead of them.

Some people who retire from an active career may think that they have entered the autumn of their lives. While its true that every beginning has an end, the retirement from a career is not the end of life. While trees shed their leaves and look bareen for a while, they do grow again with fresh leaves and brighten us during the spring season.

Similarly, this phase of transition may be a great opportunity to live life all over again. One could pursue one’s passions . We hear of such inspiring stories every day that our glass can never be half empty. It has to be always half full for us if we believe so.

Today I read about a ninety four year young lady contesting a civic elections in Chennai. This lady feels that she still has a lot to give back to society. We have super stars in the film industry who have crossed seventy five but still surprise us with their histrionic skills and are in every ad we see on TV.

Life is all what we make of it. If we live life as if today is the first day of ours, it will be so. On the other hand, if we think that we have reached the end of the road, then we lose hope and even faith in ourselves. It is like driving on a forest road. One needs to believe that the ever twining road will lead us out of the jungle. If we lose hope, we can only end as fodder for the wildlife.

We need to plan for every stage of our life and be willing to unlearn and relearn every day. Technology is transforming our lives every day. We have opportunities to learn from multiple platforms in every sphere. Money may not be a constraint to learn anymore. If at all, there is a barrier, it is in our minds. The sooner we realise it, the better it is for us.

I am amazed at the ability of people of different ages learning different skills at their own will and pace. You can see a child prodigy playing an instrument which an ustad may be ashamed of. On the other hand, I read about a globe trotting lady, who starts her journey to see the world and live her dreams at the young age of 60 and is till pursuing it vigorously at 78.

I spent my entire life in the corporate world of HR. Having spent so, I may think I have mastered this subject. But today I realise I have so much to learn even in a field I have spent my whole career. I do not know much about artificial intelligence, block chain or meta verse and how it is shaping the future of HR. I could possibly spend the rest of my life learning and still may not be able to catch up.

Last but not the least, I have a great opportunity to give back to society. I can share with the world and the younger generation of how not to makes mistakes which I did in my life. I can mentor them and guide them to live life fully.

Autumn is beginning of a new life. We need to realise it.

S Ramesh Shankar

6th February 2022