Our life every day will transcend from clarity to confusion and the other way around. Today in most circumstances, the situation is grey rather than black and white. However, we find some people, who can deal with grey as easily as with black and white.

The question before us is – “ How to evolve clarity ,in a situation full of confusion ? As I said earlier, the world today ,is more grey than ,black and white. We cannot determine most things, which are beyond our control.

It is like the gloomy weather in the western world ,during winters. When the sun shines, it is a black and white situation. Even the shadows are crisply clear. However, when the sun does not come out and it is a gloomy weather, we have a choice to crib all day or enjoy the existing weather.

In life, we always have a choice and it is up to us to decide, what clarity or confusion means to us. Nobody else in the world, will define confusion or clarity for us. If a situation is confusion, it may be worthwhile to take a step back and ask if it is only for us ,or is it for the whole world including us.

Imagine someone getting confused, on the restrictions imposed by governments, during the pandemic. The pandemic was unpredictable and the restrictions were a necessary way ,to deal with the crisis. Governments around the world, were trying their best ,to deal with the situation ,based on their daily assessment and understanding.

On the other hand, we may go on a long drive ,since the weather predicted was bright and sunny. We may be clear in our mind, that the drive is going to be enjoyable ,as the weather is going to be favourable. However, after a few hundred kilometers, there is a thunderstorm and the weather turns horrific.

We have a choice to blame the weather and regret our decision, to go on a drive with our family or enjoy the sun and the rains ,with equal fervour. Either choice, is in our hands. In one of them, we may appear confused and in the other we may be clear ,that we want to enjoy either way.

Life is no different. Some days may be sunny and other days gloomy. It is up to us to make a choice and enjoy the day ,irrespective of the weather. The weather is not in our control but the choice we make, is in our hands.

In organisations, great leaders will always be clear ,in making a choice, however ambiguous ,the situation may be. They will not vacillate in reversing their decision or making a new choice ,as the situation demands. On the other hand, brittle leaders ,will blame the environment for their failures.

Even in families and communities, parents, teachers and community leaders ,will make choices and lead the the group forward rather than blaming the circumstances or environment for their failures.

Let us learn to make the right choices in life and enjoy every day as it is. We can remain confused in any situation or be clear and move forward. It is up to us to make the choice always.

Let us learn to make the right choices always.

S Ramesh Shankar

9th Feb 2024

 

Someone sent me a nice quote today morning, which read as “The past is in our head and the future is in our hands.” I felt this quote was very insightful. We spend most of our life worrying about the past, rather than working for our future.

Let us reflect on our school and college life. We spend most of the time regretting about not doing well in a particular subject or grade, rather than preparing for the next one.

Similarly in organisations, both individuals and teams spend more time discussing about opportunities missed rather than the possibilities ahead. We need to remember that the past is not going to gift us the future. The past is history but the future is a mystery, which we need to resolve ,by our hard work and commitment to our goals.

Life is no different. We tend to spend more time worrying about about past conflicts or misunderstandings in family, community or society. We do not take the leap into the future. This requires courage to forget the past and craft our future.

I am not stating in any way ,that history is not important or that, we do not learn from failures. But, what I am trying to convey is that, time spent to look behind should definitely be less than the time invested in planning the future.

We can learn from our mistakes as individuals or teams. But, our ability to make the future fool proof ,will drive us to our dreams and goals . Past can at best be like a mirror, to learn the best lessons from our life gone by. But if we continue to look at the mirror, we may not look at the world ahead of us and people who will make it happen for us.

Let the past continue to be history and we learn from it. But let us learn to create a future through our actions today ,so that history does not repeat itself. Past can be a guide for the future and not a benchmark.

The best examples in this space is from the field of sports. Have we ever seen a sportsperson spending too much time regretting the loss in a game or missing a medal in a tournament. The best of sportspersons may learn lessons from their past but will focus on the future from the very next day.

Even if we look at team sports, teams may learn lessons from the past but will focus more on future strategies. The past can at best be a guide but the future is definitely in our hands.

We waste a lot of time regretting our past and thereby demotivating ourselves ,more than anyone else. If we spend more time time in planning and working for the future, the past may fade away in our memory and future will beckon us like sunshine in our lives.

Let us create a future of our choice since it’s in our hands.

S Ramesh Shankar

12th Jan 2024

Many of us keep wondering “what” we are doing in life ? We keep asking “Why” we are doing “What we are doing at every stage of our lives. The question before us is which should come first – “Why” or “What” ? This is the million dollar question of our lives.

In my view, it does not matter. We could do “ what” we enjoy in life. Sometimes “what” we do ,may not necessarily answer a “why” ? On the other hand, we may end up doing other things ,since we have specific reasons to do those things.

I would personally spend more time to understand ,what gives me joy in life. Yes sometimes the things which give us joy, may not have any answers to why we do them. But does it matter, as long as we enjoy it.

We need to ask ourselves if we are living first for ourselves, then for others or the other way around. I am not recommending that we lead a selfish life. What I am trying to suggest is that ,we need to live life our way first ,before we live for others.

Many of us spend most of our life time living for others and subsuming ourselves and our own needs, in the process. We may realise this, a bit late in our lives. But it is ok to realise it at any stage and make the mid course corrections.

I would say that we may have some duties, roles and responsibilities in life. This could be for our personal lives ,as well as our work lives. While discharging those roles, we need to do things ,since we know why we need to do those things.

On the other hand, there are many things in life, that we may feel like doing, which may not answer a “why” we do them. In my view, it is perfectly fine ,to do both.

Let me illustrate with some examples. We know why we tutor our kids when they are young, as that is part of our role as parents. However, if we take a long drive to an unknown destination, we may not even know why we are doing it. We do it ,because we enjoy it.

With respect to our roles and responsibilities, we have little choice, but to do them. However, with respect to other things in life, we are answerable only to our own conscience and our hearts. So, it may be worthwhile to listen to our hearts and do what we enjoy most in life.

Many may wonder, if I have had the perfect balance between “what” and “why” in life, so far. The answer is an emphatic “no”. All of us evolve in life and so am I ,trying to evolve. However, one thing I am clear is that life is imperfect for all of us and the joy is to enjoy the imperfections in our lives.

What we do in life and why we do something ,is less important in my book ,to how much we enjoy ,whatever we do in life. This may look impractical but not so. If we are willing to tread our own path ,without worrying about what the world thinks of us, this is possible.

Both “What” and “Why” are incidental and circumstantial. So let us do what we love ,from today. We may sometimes have to do things, which we may not like but those may be our duties and responsibilities in life, which in any case ,we cannot avoid.

Let us learn to weave our lives with all things we enjoy ,without worrying ,what or why about them. Of course, we have to ensure that we do not hurt or harm anyone around us ,while we do them.

Let us do what we enjoy from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

3rd Jan 2024