Many of us crib day in and night out for something or the other. We crib about not having a car or being unhappy with our career or not being able to go on a holiday abroad due to the pandemic.

This cribbing nature starts from our childhood. and continues through our adolescence and even as adults. We die by comparisons in everything from food, material things, vacations and life in general.

The only catch is that we tend to compare with people who are better off than us and not the people who are not as well placed as we are. When someone points out that we need to compare with the less privileged, we shrug it off stating that it is their destiny, what can we do about it. But the same is not our destiny when we compare and feel jealous than the better off than us.

I want to share two real life stories, which can help us reflect on what life has given us and why we need to be grateful for all that we have and not crib about all that we don’t. Both these stories are real and I have personally known them. I am changing the name of the person and place for anonymity and to respect their privacy.

The first story is that of Padma who was a house help in my house in Mumbai. She is married to a carpenter and has two lovely kids. Her husband works in a garment factory. She has admitted both her children in an english medium school since she wants them to do well in their lives.

Padma’s husband is an alcoholic and comes home drunk every day and ill treats his wife and even his kids. Apart from not contributing to the family’s finances, he ends up spending all his money on his drinking habit. He further ends up with huge debts due to this habit. His wife works in 4 houses from morning 830 am to evening 630 pm every day, six days a week and manages all the finances of the house and takes care of her young aspiring children , playing the role of mother and father to the kids.

The second story is that of Radha. Radha lives in a small town of Jabalpur. Her husband was pulling carts and now runs a small petty shop. She goes around as a beautician and earns by giving home service to women who need her services. She had two sons. The younger of the two , died ten years back committing suicide because of the poor condition of the family. Radha along with her husband with their meagre income educated her elder son. He got his MBA and today works in a bank. However, at the age of 25, instead of being grateful and indebted to his hard working parents, has become an alcoholic and misbehaves with his parents, who have made him successful in life.

I had tears in my eyes when I heard both these stories. I have personally interacted with both these women and tried to counsel them in my own way.

It is time to look at our own lives with these lenses of Radha and Padma. If we do not feel most fortunate , then there is something wrong in us. We need to look at the mirror again and again till tears dry up in our eyes.

It is time to reflect and be grateful always.

S Ramesh Shankar

25th March 2022