“Anger Management”


I grew up as a youngster losing my temper at the drop of a hat. Once when I was in college, I was waiting to meet a manager in a corporate office. The meeting was delayed and the manager made me wait in an empty stomach. I was angry and was about to leave when I saw a small placard on his table, which read ” Don’t lose your temper, nobody wants it”. It made me smile and cool down and ultimately I got the internship offer from the same company.

This incident made me ponder whether it is worth losing your cool often. We are human beings and are likely to wilt under pressure when things don’t go our way. It has happened to me a work and at home.

When my kids were young and we had to manage the pressures of home and work, both me and my spouse often lost our cool. It may be easier to advise youngsters today that you have to treat kids well and don’t get angry with them. However, as a young parent when you do not have adequate support mechanism at home, you do tend to lose your cool when things go out of control.

One of the good things which happened in my life is that my spouse and me complemented each other to control our temper. When I used to lose my cool at work or otherwise in my younger days, my wife was my counsellor and coach. When she lost her cool as a young mother, I could support her and enable her to be calm with the kids.

As I grew older, I realised that it is worthwhile to be patient and keep your cool rather than lose it. This is one quality I wish I had imbibed from my father. I have seen him lose his cool only twice in his life time. This gave me the inspiration to work on this aspect of my nature.

Today I can confidently say that I also hardly lose my cool. It pays to be patient. If you remain calm, you are more balanced in your decision and also helps you maintain your blood pressure. Nobody respects you for your temper. On the contrary, you earn your respect with your patient demeanour.

Every time one is tested, it is worthwhile to take a pause, may be count 60 and try to reflect whether it is worthwhile to lose your cool. Hot temper only can lead to avoidable conflicts and inappropriate decisions.

It may be not be easy to mould your patience but it is worth a try. The consequences are long term and builds your character.

Let us try it from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

12 thoughts on ““Anger Management”

  1. The problem with anger is our brain gets agitated and in the agiated condtion reason fails. We realise our folly once our mind comes to ground state i.e still when we can think logically. we then repent our anger .

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Good share Ramesh – you will agree self awareness clubbed with conscious self regulation is possible answer and fix to such challenges. Additionally, self compassion and self care helps to maximise gains in life . You did all of these Ramesh ! Kudos..

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Great article sir! Anger management is very important. It can solve many unwanted problems in life but it has to be practiced sincerely until it become a part of you life.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Nice article. We are being controlled by the situation/people when we get angry. Why should we give others a chance to control us? So better let go and be the controller of our life. I feel should also explain the anger.. rather than expressing it as it also needs to be vented out.


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