Life is like a broken glass, when some incidents in your life shatter your basic ethos of life. You may have worked hard and achieved a reasonable success in life and work. But all that gets destroyed in seconds with some such incidents. I would like to share three such incidents I have witnessed and how to deal with them and bounce back.

The first incident was when a close family friend of many years suddenly stopped talking to us ,for no understandable reason. They neither had a fight with us nor informed us ,why they did so. We grew up together and would visit each other and were almost like one family. Then suddenly ,one day ,they stopped talking to us and did not want us to visit them too.

Although this incident shook us apart and made us wonder what could have happened, the mystery remains till date. While we never understood the root causes, we bounced back believing that we did not do any wrong and hence we could consider it ,as a bad dream. Every human, who makes a mistake knows to herself or himself. Our conscience does not lie to anyone. Hence, this realisation of self belief made us bounce back.

One also realises that beyond a point ,there is no reason to wonder what happened. What happened is a reality of life and one has to live and deal with it. One could ask oneself ,if we have done anything wrong. If yes, seek forgiveness for our wrongs. If not, forget the incident and learn to move on in life. Our conscience will never lie.

The second incident was during my work days. I had a colleague at work, who was an affable human being. She was full of empathy and always there to help others in every possible way. However, she got posted in a role, which did not suit her best and hence could not deliver. As the leader in the team, it was my responsibility to bail her out of this role and find an alternate role, which suited her strengths. I did that and was happy ,she started doing well in this new role.

When this person got moved from one role to the other, she told some of her colleagues and friends ,that I had not supported her enough. On the contrary, I even saved her job as she was in the firing line ,by some of her seniors. I visited her city recently and wanted to have a cup of tea but she did not even want to meet me. I was shocked but realised that I had done my duty and may be something else ,has upset her. I need to forgive her and move on as she is still a good human being, whom I respect a lot.

The third incident was when I read about a leading business man in some country ,asking his father to leave his house. I saw a video of the father, who was narrating of how he built his business and handed over to his son. However, after the son took control of the business, he possibly thought that the father is more of a liability than an asset and wanted to separate from him. I was perplexed as to how a son could do this to his father. However, not being privy to what went wrong, I did not want to comment or wonder about this incident. However, later I came to know that the spouse of this business man ( son) had sought divorce and also wanted to leave him for the nature of her husband. This made me realise ,that life comes a full circle. We reap what we sow. If we sow love, we reap love. But, if we spread hatred, we get back hatred in a different form. In Hinduism, we call this “Karma”. What goes around, comes around. Knowingly or unknowingly if we do good deeds, there is no way we will not benefit from the good deeds of others.

Life is a mystery. There could be days, when the sun will shine brightly but there could be other days, when the sun will never rise and the mood could turn gloomy. We have to live waiting for the sun to rise again in our lives.

We have to accept life with both sugar and salt with equal measure.

S Ramesh Shankar

13th March 2024

I am a born optimist. I always feel our future and the future of our children is bright. We live in an era, where technology is galloping ahead every day. Artificial intelligence is challenging human intelligence every day of our lives.

Let us start with education. The scope of education is limitless today. We have moved much beyond the classical education system. There are multi- disciplinary approaches in every step of the education system.

The schools have multiple approaches to educating a child. The use of technology in education, is enhancing the learning abilities of children. Education is cutting across boundaries of nations and universities. educations institutions are truly turning global, to learn and share their latest research and teaching methods.

If we move to the life of children within homes, it has also developed in a multi dimensional way. Today ,children have access to information and technology ,at their fingertips. They need not walk out of their home, to know the best school across the world ,for any field of education.

Similarly if we take the field of sports, the world is the playground for children. Kids have access ,to the best training and coaches ,across the world. They can learn and train from any part of the world and practise anywhere as per their choice.

If we move to arts, theatre and films, technology has shrunk the time taken to make movies. Today ,kids can learn to make videos and films even on mobile phone and many successful films, have been launched. Access to art museums across the world ,is at the click of a button.

The one area I may be a bit concerned ,is the area of social institutions. The concept of “marriage” and “family” as social institutions ,are breaking down and hence children may not have the social net around them ,to guide and support them in times of crises or need. However, I may be wrong in my assumption and may be other social institutions may take over this role of parents and siblings.

As parents and teachers we need to ensure that children do not become overtly competitive and ambitious, which treads on the sensitive line of human relationships between peers. It is best to compete with oneself rather than with others. We need to inculcate this human value continuously, in our children. This could also result in disappointment where parents and teachers can play a role ,to channelise their ambitions and goals ,in their areas of strength rather than weaknesses, so that they succeed.

The average intelligence of the child today , is multiple fold of the past generations. The learning ability and also the ability to adapt and change ,is also much better than ,what we had experienced in our childhood.

While technology will definitely take us to a brighter tomorrow, we need to guard and ensure ,that the basic human values are instilled on the child. These could be as simple as respect, gratitude, contentment and so on. These values need to instilled by schools and parents, with equal partnership.

We also need to evolve a social and political system in society, which embraces human values and promotes them. If we end up in a highly competitive world ,where human value diminishes, then that may not be the best future for our children.

I see a bright future for our children , and responsibility to create the future ,lies on us. We need to imbibe the best of technology and embed them, with the best of human values, for a happier world tomorrow.

Let us create a future for our children, which is better and happier than what we have today.

S Ramesh Shankar

5th Jan 2024

Life is brittle and fluid. One moment can change our lives. It could be a positive change, which transforms our lives like we never imagined. On the other hand, it could be a life shattering experience and could make us believe that there is no light at the end of the tunnel.

This ephemeral life ,is for all of us. Whether men are born in Mars or women in Venus, I do not know ,but life is the same for all of us. It is up to us ,to take this moment in our stride and manage to deal with it.

A great moment like admission in a great academic institution or the job offer from your dream company ,could change your life forever. However, it is important to believe, that this moment may change your life course ,but the after effects may not last forever.

Imagine getting into the best academic institution in your country. However, if we do not pursue our academic course to the best of our ability and come out in flying colours, we may have nobody else to blame.

The moment which catapulted us into a different space ,may not last our lifetime. If we fail in our academic pursuits and fail in our final exams, we may never get placed in any organisation of repute and this may lead to a moment of despair for us.

The lesson to be learnt here is that, such moments do not last forever. They could come and go and we need to deal with them accordingly. Our getting admission in the best institute of the country may be due to our hard work and perseverance. We get rewarded for our efforts. But then to come out in flying colours at the end of the course ,will be determined by our efforts ,after this moment.

If a moment of joy catapults us to the sky, it could also make us land abruptly afterwards ,if we do not take the necessary follow up efforts as given in the example of admission to the best academic institution.

On the other hand, a moment could impact our life negatively too. We may miss a promotion, when we think we deserve it most and others in the team too think the same way. This moment may shatter our confidence and self belief. However, it is our courage and resilience to deal with such moments, which may bring out the best in us. The greatest of human beings ,learn more from failures than successes.

We need to remember that such life changing moments may happen to us, at different stages of life. But they do not last forever. Our ability to be grounded in moments of joy as well as perseverance and resilience in moments of despair ,may help us to be a winner in life ,always.

These moments occur both in personal and professional lives. It could be a moment of joy ,at the birth of our first child. It could be the moment of tragedy, to lose a parent at a young age. An expected reward/recognition at work will delight us. On the other hand, losing a job during a pandemic or a restructuring of an organisation ,may shatter our hopes.

We need to remember that both joy and sorrow is transitory. If we learn to take both ,in our stride, we can manage both these moments resolutely ,without impacting our lives adversely.

Nothing is permanent ,including a moment in life.

All moments may help us improve and change.

S Ramesh Shankar

7th Dec 2023