Many of us fall in love with the position we hold in life be it in the family, community or at work. We think our position gives us status, pride and respect. While it is true that many people respect the position more than the person, but when you leave a position, you are respected only for the person you are.

It may be invaluable to realise early in life that people respect the person in you more than the position you hold. Position may come and go but the person remains forever. You may be the President of your country or the CEO of your business but tomorrow, you remain only the person behind the position.

Some of us get away with unpardonable behaviour when we are holding positions of authority. We may wield our power and get away with whatever we say or do. But as soon as we vacate the same position of power, people either ignore us or forget us.

On the other hand, if you are grounded and live a life loving everyone around you and respecting them irrespective of the position you hold, then people remember you forever. They remember the way you treated them even if they forget the position you held while you treated them that way.

Our behaviour is permanent while our positions are ephemeral. We tend to get stuck to positions and forget the person in us. We tend to believe that the position we hold will take care of us and insulate us from the repercussions of bad conduct.

While this may be partially true till we hold that position of power, it fades always as soon as we move on. People do not remember the positions we held forever. Positions are static and temporary while persons are dynamic and live their life time.

It is important for us to realise that people respect our behaviour because of the person we are. They may continue to respect us for our behaviour even if we move on from the positions of power as long as our behaviour continues to be endearing. The day we think position and power can get us everything in life and we can get away with all our actions , we may be misled.

This basic tenet of life is true for family, community, society or even organisations. We love our parents since they are caring in nature and treat us with love and dignity. We love our teachers because they have nurtured us, irrespective of our tantrums and never wielded power to guide us.

We respect colleagues at work who have always guided us and led us to behave well through their actions more than their words or positions. We tend to follow what we see in them rather than what they say or what position they hold.

Let us mould our behaviour and shape our personality to be loving, caring and endearing always, to everyone around us.

Positions will come and go but person remains the same

S Ramesh Shankar

1st August 2021

We do not realise many a time as to when life begins and when it ends. Many of us tend to believe that life begins at birth and ends at our death. It may or may not be true. This is because we do not live life fully till the day we realise what life is ?

I have met people in my life who have worked very hard and toiled their way through ups and downs, sacrificed their lives for their family, relatives or friends but never lived life to its full glory.

I am not advocating leading a self fulfilling life at the cost of others. I am suggesting that one needs to live life the way one would like to without any full stops.

This means we have to believe life may have commas, semi colons and colons but never a full stop. Every obstacle in our life could be an enabler for our resolve to live life fully. Most of us get stumped by the commas and semi colons of life. We need to believe that everyone goes through a “Sonder” in their lives. We are no different. We need to believe that if the sun sets today, it has to rise tomorrow in our lives too.

I do not believe that that the sun sets forever in anybody’s life. All hurdles and challenges are only ephemeral. They will disappear as fast as they appear. If we postpone living life to a tomorrow, it may never come.

We need to live life today and every day of our lives. While yesterday will fade away, sometimes a tomorrow of our choice may be elusive. It may be worthwhile to believe that “today” is the best day of our lives. We also need to believe that there are millions of people around the world, whose lives are more challenging than ours.

A feeling of gratitude for all that we have in life as compared to those millions of have nots may make all the difference to our lives and living. The pandemic today worldwide is a good reminder for all of us for being grateful for all that we have.

Most of us have a place to live in, food to eat, a family to support and friends to cherish. What else can we ask for ? Imagine the plight of the migrant labour who has lost his job in an urban city , then forced to migrate to his village and unable to feed his family and self . Aren’t we better off than most of such stories of people losing lives and livelihood. Isn’t it time for us to rekindle our conscience and bow in gratitude to God.

I have worked and lived in different parts of India. Hailing from a lower middle class family I have worked hard to earn my living. Today when I look back, I realise how fortunate I have been right throughout my life and lived the way I always wanted to. Although, I did not have all the material things I may have desired at the early stages of my life, I always had love and happiness in abundance.

The best is to learn from our kids. Even in the most difficult times, they will find happiness in small things of life and enjoy. It is time to realise that money cannot buy love and happiness.

As in the photo above, irrespective of what others think this girl is admiring her smile.

Let us bow in gratitude and live life to the fullest from today.

S Ramesh Shankar

8th October 2020

I started working with computers way back in 1985, when the public sector I used to work for introduced computers for the first time . The computers used to be like a piece of art and kept under velvet covers inside cabins of very senior managers.

As time passed by, we got opportunities to touch and feel computers and today it is almost in the hand of every individual in the form of smart mobiles, laptops or smart notebooks. Today, we possibly cannot think of our lives without the ubiquitous mobile or notebook around us all the time.

One of the fascinating things of a computer is that it is fun and a great aid when it works but it literally puts you out of your senses when it stops. Many of us have become practising hardware or software engineers by chance rather than by choice. We try all our tricks under the trade without knowing much about it. The most often trick applied to reset and restart a computer which is not working is to press the “Control+Alt+del” buttons.

A few days back I realised I need to do the same with myself. I was in the midst of many things happening around me – both personal and work wise and felt that I was getting mentally and physically exhausted. It is at such times, you feel you need to reset and restart your life all over again.

Resetting your life and restarting could be different for different people in their lives. For me, one of the best ways to relax, reset and restart my life is to go on a long drive to a hill or a beach and be with myself amidst nature. I did exactly the same.

I booked a club on a hill resort and drove away from my city for a short break. A beautiful drive along green forests and virgin hills makes you one with nature. The last lap was in the midst of a beautiful green forest and the twining roads of the hills.

I reached my destination safely and in view of the pandemic decided to spend a few days all with myself and my spouse with no agenda and no schedules. We had breakfast, lunch and dinner at the allocated times, looked at the plantations through the balcony, listened to some relaxing music and rested day and night.

I realised just like machines, man also needed to reset and restart his life once in a way. The periodicity may differ from person to person. It is upto you to decide when you need to press the “control+alt+del” in your life. There is no right or wrong time. Each of us have our life keyboard with us and we are the pilots of our own destinies. It is upto us to decide when to start and when to end.

As in the photo above, when three of my classmates met recently we agreed that we need to reset and restart our lives periodically.

Today I feel refreshed and will go back to my regular routine from tomorrow after a nice drive back home again. It is upto you to decide what can help you to relax. As I said, while it is a nice drive and a place close to nature for me, it could be siting at home for you or watching a cricket or football match in a stadium.

Is it time to reset and restart your own life today ?

S Ramesh Shankar

5th April 2021