Life is all about relationships. It starts within the family and then extends to friends, relatives and colleagues at the workplace. We live and thrive based on our relationships and the quality of the same.

There are some relationships which happen not by our choice and others ,we get into. Our relationships in the family or relatives, is not determined by us. We do not choose which family we are to be born into and thereby determine our parents, siblings or relatives.

On the other hand, many of our relationships are self determined. We may choose our spouse and get married and thereby determine who our partner in life would be. We decide who our friends would be and which neighbourhood, we want to live in.

Similarly at the work place, we cannot decide who our manger would be or our colleagues at work place. The manager ,determines her team members and has the discretion to change them ,as per work needs.

So, the crucial question before us is – “are all relationships contractual ? Yes, we do sign contracts of employment and sometimes even in businesses with vendors and customers. Even then, the critical question is – “ are all relationships determined by contracts, contractual ?

Today, we tend to believe ,that most of our relationships are indeed contractual. We tend to believe that we work for an organisation based on the contract, we have signed for them. Our suppliers are bound to supply goods or services, based on the terms of the contract ,we have signed with them. Similarly, we are bound to supply goods or services to our customers ,as we are bound by the contract, we have agreed with them.

While it is true that all contracts in life ,are governed by laws of contracts of the place ,we have signed them in. However, the important lesson to remember in life is that, all relationships are not contractual ?

I would like to illustrate ,this invaluable lesson in life ,through some real life examples. A loyal employee will go beyond the call of duty to delight a customer. For example in an emergency, doctors may work much beyond their duty hours ,to save critical lives. Similarly, a supplier may supply goods and services ,even without receiving payments ,when the customer is in dire straits. This is not because, the contract says so ,but they value the relationship, which has been developed over the years ,with their customers.

We need to realise that all relationships are not contractual. We need to understand that ,as we invest and build a relationship, it grows much beyond the terms ,of any contract. Relationships are built, on an edifice of emotions and mutual commitment.

The day we realise that relationships are beyond contracts , we may have arrived. Let’s continue to build relationships, all around us. With great relationships, we can get anything in life and overcome any hurdle, without any difficulty.

Relationships are like the glue in life. We not only need to build them over the years ,but maintain and sustain them. We should consider building relationships, as a continual journey in life.

Relationship should never be a means to an end, it has to be an end in itself and unconditional always.

S Ramesh Shankar

1st Oct 2024