We all love to talk rather than listen. We want everyone around us to listen to us while we talk. But, we do not care to listen to others when they talk. We want others to be empathic to us all the time but we will not do the same.

Empathy is the art of putting oneself ,in the shoes of others. If we are able to do that ,we know where the shoe pinches. In our everyday life we have full of advices for others. Many a time, we are not bothered if we appreciate the other person’s position before we give advice.

This is true in our personal and professional lives. We advise our children to do things ,which we dreaded doing. We expect the impossible from our children in academics, sports or even in cultural events ,while we may have been an average student and never participated in them.

In the work environment, leaders are not different. They will demand from their team what they have never done. It is like a coach telling a player ,to try something, which he himself would have never practised. Such leaders have no credibility. They survive ,only by wielding their power and position .once that disappears, nobody respects them in their team.

Life is no different. We expect from others ,what we do not practise. We seldom put ourselves in the position of someone ,before we demand anything from them. This makes us hollow human beings. Neither the family nor the society will ever respect us ,for the same.

However, one may sometimes wonder as to “ Why people do it repeatedly although they are aware of it ? This may be because of our ego or because of our position in the family, organisation or society. People do not realise ,that others value the person and not the position. There may be a wrong belief that people respect position but the reality hits us ,only when the person vacates that position.

We may need to practise before we preach. We need to empathise and not sympathise with others ,before we demand anything. Our ability to see the world through the eyes and ears of others ,may help us be grounded and not float in the air. Our credibility as a human being and as a leader ,in any social context, goes up when we live the values we preach.

It may be time to look at the mirror before we look at others. It may be time to look before we leap. Our ability to experience the world through the prism of others will make us better human beings.

The day we realise that the life of others is different from us and we need to experience their worldview before we impose our worldview, our life will be different. Our eyes may open to a new world which we may not have experienced before.

Let us learn to change ourselves before we attempt to change the world.

S Ramesh shankar

15th February 2023