There are many things in life which go with the wind and we do not even realise it. I wanted to share a few of my personal experiences and wanted to check if it is true for you too.

The first experience I have is that of lending books to family or friends. People are very excited to borrow a book they like as they want to read it . You do not mind lending the same since sharing knowledge adds to yours. But the beauty of many of these books is that it never returns to your book shelf. They take it, may or may not read it but mostly forget to return it.

One common experience is with pens. People forget to get their pens and borrow it from others when they need them. However, they never remember to return after they use them. I have lost a few expensive pens in this process. Nowadays I use only throw away pens so that you don’t feel bad when not returned.

The next experience is with clothes. As your kids grow up and start wearing your clothes, you feel good that your clothes have started fitting them. My son generally ventures into my wardrobe to see which T shirt is new and loves to wear them. However, some of these clothes taken by friends or relatives never return to our wardrobe.  

My wife is to embroider/knit special clothes for children. Then she used to share with relatives or friends to be used for their children as our kids have grown up. While giving she would specifically state that it was a unique piece of garment she had embroidered and wanted it to be returned after use But it never returns and people forget about it.

This experience may even extend to gadgets. I remember once I lent my infra red heating lamp to a friend who was in severe back pain. She recovered and was very grateful for the help. However, even after a few reminders she did not return the same.

It could extend to things in the kitchen. You want to share some food with your neighbours and send it to them in tiffin boxes. The food is consumed and appreciated as well but the tiffin boxes never returns.

It may be our possessive nature and our emotional connect to material things which makes us feel bad to lose them. But more than that one feels that on the one hand you lent a helping hand to someone in need and in return you lose your possession.

I used to feel quite upset at such incidents in the past. I then glanced through an old quote , which read – “ If you love something set it free, if it belongs to you, it will come back, if it does not, it never was…”. It is then I realised that one has to consider that your possession was possibly never yours in the first place. Alternatively, the other person needs it more than you.

While this may be easy to write about, it is a difficult emotion to go through. The first time you lose a book you love, you almost decide to never lend books again. Same may be true for other things. But as you grow and mature, you are willing to let go of your possessions although reluctantly.

As we can see in the photo above, we take time to realise that the value of the pen we lose may be less than the relationship we may lose in the process.

I sometimes wonder why people do not return things they took from you in time. I assume they have no ill intentions. It either could be forgetfulness or their attitude to life. I did realise that I would get impacted by such incidences only when I get too attached. If I let go, may be this will easier to overcome.

Time to “let go” in life.

S Ramesh Shankar